How to use your IPhone


I’m sitting at my dining room table that is covered in a weird mash up of magazine pictures and things modge podged on by old roommates while they were tripping on acid, and I’m writing about my favorite apps for my iPhone. I feel so…. edgy. I wish I could just take a picture and hold onto it as proof that I can be cool. Everything else in my life goes against this notion – but not this. I’ve made it. I’m here, everyone. What’s up?

1. Cracked.

Best app EVER. Okay so do you know the website If you don’t you should. I’ve learned so many awesome, random things on there that make perfect conversation at parties (provided that you aren’t trying to woo a new flame). I’ve learned about the most badass bank heists ever, animals that have human traits, and countless other bits of useless information. I’m not going to claim that this app will change your life, but I will say that every once in awhile I learn something genuinely helpful on there. I learned a “brain hack” that helps you remember things just the other day. I’ve successfully been using it to remember the never ending ingredient list for the menu items at my new job. It will also provide you with hours of interesting reading material while you are on the bus, a plane, or while you are waiting for your roommate to get dressed so you can go party. I use it for all of the above.

2. Tinder.

This makes me feel like a terrible person. Basically it is an app that allows you to rate users (men or women depending on your sexual orientation). If you swipe to the left it means you like them (it’s like checking the little box on a middle schooler’s love note), and right if you don’t. If you like someone and they like you it will notify you and you can begin texting (read: sexting) them. There is like .01% chance of rejection, because in order to get to the point of talking you both have determined you already like each other. Reasons it makes me feel like an asshole: 1. I have ZERO interest in actually talking to ANYONE. I’m merely using this as a tool to boost my wounded (newly single) confidence. 2. You are literally rating people purely based off of physical appearance. Not like we don’t anyway, but at least in person we can pretend we didn’t choose the guy because of his six pack, but actually his personality. Also, like Cracked, it provides hours of mind numbing entertainment. It is about on par with watching the Jersey Shore.

3. IMDb.

I’m the annoying person that has to know everything about every actor, and every behind the scenes bit of information about a movie while watching it. As soon as the movie is over I could care less – I need to know as I’m watching it. I’m much more interested in this information than the actually movie. It can be really annoying when I’m sitting there clacking away at my computer while my companions are watching a movie, because I care so much about who that extra in the background is. This allows me to be a movie creep on my phone instead.

4. Google Maps.

Because I hate the maps app on the iPhone. It sucks, and doesn’t have bus routes. Google Maps however is free and amazing. Done!

5. Everest.

Everest is for completing goals, and it is also a really beautifully designed app. It’s super simple, and helpful! You plug in your goals then you add steps to completing each goal. After that you can assign dates and times for the steps, and soon enough you are crossing shit off you bucket list like you’re Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson.

6. Youtube.

This is an obvious one. I use it for everything from watching cute animal videos (everyday) to listening to songs when I’m too cheap to pay for them, or too lazy to grab my iPod. It works for all of these things.

7. Any.DO.

I’m not going to pretend like I’ve tested many different to do apps, and settled on this one as the best. Honestly, it is the only one that I’ve tried… ever. I’m not much for to do lists, because that means productivity. My aversion to productivity is about as strong as Sally’s is to Harry in the beginning. She knows she needs him to drive to New York City, but she hates him all the same. I would say though that this is a pretty unoffensive to do list app. Bonus: you get to swipe things off when you are done, and it puts a line through them. I find this incredibly satisfying.

8. TED

I love TED videos. LOVE THEM. This app puts all of those awesome videos on your phone instead. You can put in what kind of video you want to watch, and how much time you have and away it goes. I also feel like a smart person when this app is on my phone. People can see that I care about learning things outside of school. In all honesty though – TED is the best.

9. MapMyRun.

Now, I don’t actually run. I like to use this to mark my bike routes, and see how far I went. It also tells you your speed, and all that fun stuff. My one negative is that it sends you emails to make you feel guilty when you go too long without working out. I don’t like that. There is nothing worse than feeling lazy, and then having an email pop up telling you just how lazy you are.

10. Happy Hours.

Yeah. Basically everything you’ve ever wanted. It tells you all of the Happy Hours in your area. You’re welcome.

Worth mentioning: Snapchat. gFlash+. Vine. Goodreads. Duolingo. Lyft (for San Francisco based people). Moon. Cabulous. Kayak (when you want to fantasize about the vacation you can’t afford). LED Flashlight. Cue. Google Drive.



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